The Weekly Wine

Fellow Wine Lovers,

I’ve had this page open for several hours now and despite almost continually giving it the thousand yard stare, the paper has stayed resolutely blank the entire time. I have had some lovely customers to serve, we’ve shot the breeze about how nice it turned out today and the natural boost to rosé sales, but nobody has given me that snappy opener for this week’s email.

We’ll crack on though, shall we?

In the USA, it would appear that former Trump consigliere, Steve Bannon, has been indicted for defrauding hundreds of thousands of donors to the “We Build The Wall” campaign, under the false pretence that all the money would be used for construction (I wonder if he knows anyone in construction?).  It seems that at least a million dollars went straight into Mr Bannon’s pocket for personal expenses. What we particularly liked was that he was taken into custody by agents of the US Postal Service.

Whilst we’re on this subject, it would appear that a company with longstanding links to Michael Gove and Dominic Cummings has been working behind the scenes with Ofqual, the agency overseeing the exam debacle. Now, we’re clearly not suggesting there is anything underhand, shady or dishonest going on, but it doesn’t look good does it? Incidentally, the company is called Public First, which rather tickled the funny bone too!

In other unrelated news, former Chancellor Sajid Javid has got a job at JP Morgan. How that works I don’t understand, I thought us taxpayers were employing him as MP for Bromsgrove. We’re absolutely sure he’ll have his Chinese walls to guard against revealing internal government policy and privileged information. But it doesn’t look good does it?

In possibly rather niche music news, Cabaret Voltaire are releasing their first studio album in 26 years. Shadow of Fear comes out on November 20^th and if you’re quick you may be able to order a Limited Edition Double on purple vinyl!

We don’t talk much of County Cricket here, but I’d just like to mention that Essex have a 100% record in the Bob Willis Trophy having won three from three. On the International front, we’re batting first in the third test.

In other sports news, transfers have been happening all over the shop, lots of big numbers thrown around as usual. The one we both found a bit puzzling is Joe Hart ending up at Tottenham, how’s he going to get a game whilst Lloris is there? We shall have to watch and see I guess, but it’s definitely a puzzlement!

Team Ineos have left out Froome and Thomas from the Tour de France squad. Froome is no surprise given his fitness levels after last year’s awful accident, frankly I find it incredible he’s come this far. Geraint is aiming for the Giro which gives him a bit more time to get his fitness up, but I was slightly surprised on that one. Dave Brailsford is proving once again there’s no room for sentiment and that he’s paid the big bucks to get wins not mates! Personally, I’m not sure the race is going to make it all the way to Paris, but that should make the first week even more exciting. It all kicks off in Nice on Saturday 29^th August.

I think that’ll be us for this week, have a great weekend everyone and drop by if you’re about, or email us an order if you’d like us to come to you – especially if you’re under the big Q!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

As A-level students received their results yesterday we found ourselves pondering, and not for the first time, on what an odd year 2020 has turned out to be. Gavin Williamson’s comments that “Increasing the A-level grades will mean a whole generation could end up promoted beyond their abilities” had us stitching our sides back up and calling Alanis Morissette for a comment. It would appear she’s off on holiday somewhere like many of you.

We might have tried another tack… “Minister, how does a student with mock results of A, A, and A, with assessments from the school of A*, A, and A* end up with grades of B, B and C?” All of a sudden you have to quarantine if you’ve travelled through France and the A-levels are off the front page. Cynical, sickening or the modern way – you choose.

Alex has been on holiday this week, out and about strolling moors with the family, possibly a game of swing ball or two, before counting real sheep in time for bed. Meanwhile I’ve been having an almost Greek sojourn here in Wimbledon Park. We’ve certainly had the weather; I’ve had Greek salad for lunch, listened to the rumble of thunder for an hour or so yesterday whilst the streets of Twickenham and Hammersmith got positively jet-washed by Mother Nature. The way it’s going I might even have to find some Ouzo to go with my fish & chips tonight!

In the Isle of Wight they do appear to have discovered a new dinosaur. Bones were found near Shanklin that are the vertebrae of an as yet undiscovered genus of dinosaur. The palaeontologists from Southampton University were understandably excited: “You don’t usually find dinosaurs in the deposits at Shanklin, you’re much more likely to find fossil oysters or driftwood, so this is a rare find indeed. It is likely the Vectaerovenator lived in an area just north of where its remains were found, with the carcass having washed out into the shallow sea nearby.” Seems to me that the Isle of Wight really is the original Jurassic Park!

In US news we learn that Trumpolina ducked the difficult question: “Mr President, after three and a half years, do you regret at all, all the lying you’ve done to the American people?” Aside from that, he’s just not happy with his wash. It appears he will compel the water companies to act because he’s not getting enough water pressure in his shower, and he needs his hair to be ‘perfect’. There is obviously nothing else of note happening in the US whatsoever, we did warn you about news in August!

But at least we do have some sport to talk about. Not only did England surprise us all in the first test with a successful run chase, but when rain stopped play yesterday Pakistan were 126-5, even with the obligatory dropped catches from England. Looks like rain may play a big part in it though, with the storms looking set to continue.

Talking of storms, the Critérium du Dauphiné was hit by a hailstorm yesterday with golf ball sized ice lumps raining down on the peloton right at the finish. The riders were desperately trying to stay upright, some walked, and one even took cover under a tent just 500m from the finish. Primo Roglic won the stage though, and looks to be in really decent form.  Typically this race is where everyone tests out their legs before the Tour de France, and this year is no different, just later. UK Cycling Expert on twitter suggests the race is named because we get to see who is climbing like a sack of potatoes!

In our occasional series of summer holiday drinking at home we thought this week we’d mention Kopke White Port (£15.99). It’s a golden colour in the glass with notes of apricot, honey and spices. The palate starts off with a sweet attack but moves onto a citrus laden dry finish. We’d suggest serving it as a long drink over ice with either tonic or ginger beer as a real summer refresher.

Otherwise if you’d like a delivery drop us a line as usual, or do swing by to see us in the shop!

Cheers!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

‘“Well, right here, the United States is lowest in numerous categories.  We’re lower than the world.  Lower than Europe.’  – oh Donald, that’s true in oh so many ways!  It was only Monday but we already had the quote of the week in the bag – it was as if our friend in the White House didn’t quite have a full grasp of the figures in front of him.  However one would always hope that the even simplest of souls could work out that any US total would always be less than the overall world total.

If none of the paragraph above makes any sense to you, cut and paste the italicised quote into your favourite search engine, sit back and enjoy!

Anyway, enough about the activities across the pond, what’s news over here?  Having spent last week barbecuing fish and dipping tentative toes into the English Channel whilst pretending some days that I could quite easily be in Spain it was back to reality on Monday.  Spending any time away from London for the first time this year was a joy and indeed it was very easy to imagine that nothing was wrong in the world when the days consisted of walking the dog, surfing (for some), eating local treats and perhaps the odd glass of wine.  A not-so-quick pit-stop at Fleet services on the way back up quickly burst any bucolic bubble and so I was well prepared for London when it arrived.

It is, however, now August and, as we all know, even in a good year it becomes silly season in the news media as real news dries up and people slope of on hols.  So, in a year that has been so dominated by just one news story, I imagine the hacks who weren’t quite quick enough to get their summer holidays in the diary have been sitting at their desks with their hair in clumps – which leads us to an occasional feature called, ‘Only in August: headlines that shouldn’t be…’

(In fairness, they are booze related and all from The Drinks Business pages but that doesn’t make them any less ‘true’!)

Ice cream containing spirits now legal in New York state

Well thank goodness for that.  The good people of New York needed some good news after the torrid months they have had and frankly what could be better than knowing your rum ‘n’ raisin might actually have real, cheap, cooking rum in it, up to a max of 5% – I know, if only we could buy it here…

Keeping with the spirit of additives in, er, spirits:

Spirit flavoured with silkworm poo released in Japan

Eager not to be outdone by the Americans it would seem, this is from The Mitosaya Botanical Distillery.  The silkworm droppings have been traditionally used in Chinese medicine since ancient times and are believed to improve blood flow and relief pain in joints and the abdomen.  Whether this is still true when distilled to 42% we can’t say but we do have our opinion…

Fortnum & Mason has struck a deal with Tyneside’s only urban winery, Laneberg, to produce its first own-label English still white wine.

I really want to be positive about this but I’m still not sure that this is what we’ve been waiting for.  The grapes for the wine come from Poulton Hill Estate in the Cotswolds and are then transported 270 miles to Gateshead to be vinified, which immediately feels like an unnecessary journey to me but anyway.  It’s not a gimmick, the wine was blind tasted and chosen without prejudice but I still can’t quite get my head around the purpose of urban wineries.  I am, of course, a dinosaur still immersed in the dying realm of high street retail, what do I know …

And finally, the one that made me feel warm inside for some reason:

Japanese train station to release first wine

Platforms 3 & 4 at Shiojiri train station have been home to vine laden pergolas since the late 1980’s, planted as a welcome to visitors, for this is a gateway to Japan’s wine country.  They’d never made wine from the grapes before but decided to make 100 bottles to celebrate 60th anniversary of Shiojiri’s elevation to city status.  As I said, it’s just a nice story that leaves a warm feeling….

Outside of wine and west country holidays we welcome Fulham back up to the Premiership, Arsenal win the FA cup to go into the Europa League Group stages, relegating Tottenham to the Europa League qualifiers (HA!), Chris Froome looks like he’s moving closer to retirement whether he likes it or not and the cricket is collapsing. 

Potentially the biggest disappointment of the week is the fact that Brazilian winger, Everton is likely to choose Benfica as his new home, rather than the blue surroundings of Goodison Park.

And finally, a warning to Wayne, for when he goes a-travelling to Belgium with his wife.

Man thrown out of Belgian IKEA for secretly shopping with wife

IKEA currently only allows one customer per household, in line with the current Belgian government rules – this gentleman however flouted them and will now become the butt of many jokes around Ghent and beyond.  The moral of this story, never get caught in IKEA, full stop!

That’s all from us for now, it’s hotting up, rosé is chilling down and we’re ready to help you enjoy the sunshine – we’re here until 7pm today and until 6pm tomorrow – come and say hello!

Cheers!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

As bowling alleys stay shut and blackjack is off the table, it seems to me that Stonehenge has got it all going on again lately. No sooner had we joked about the best photos of it being from the traffic jam on the A303, than we received one! Fast forward a few days and the entire archaeological community is agog with the discovery, finally, that the standy uppy stones (Sarsens, but not as in vinegar!) come from just up the road in West Woods about 15 miles away. Now call me old fashioned but I suspect that definitely rules out any chance of a by-pass!

Trumpolina seems to have noticed that he isn’t doing as well as he’d like in the upcoming Presidential elections. He has suggested that the election is delayed because of the enormous risk of voter fraud in postal ballots that will be held in some states. I believe the words used were in fact: “most inaccurate and fraudulent election in history”. There is no evidence to back this up over the many elections held thus far in the USA. It made us wonder if he has a new plan but more than anything it made us think of the term brass necked!

Big news of the week though is actually relevant to all of us in this Weekly Wine bubble. As you know, we’ve been using the Volvo’s impressive turning circle to good effect the last few months. Delivering wine and chatting on distanced doorsteps we have found that many of you have been concerned that you’ve been drinking rather more than usual. We tried to offer some comfort by suggesting that it was the one stop recycling that was the issue.

Well the data is in folks, and frankly, it looks like you’ve not been pulling your weight! We’ve consumed, as a nation, 1.3 billion litres of alcohol, DOWN from 2 billion litres for the same period last year. I’ll pass you over to Gemma Cooper senior client business partner at Nielson for comment: “While there is a perception that lockdown has been a boozy one and that we’re consuming more alcohol than normal, this is far from the case. Without being able to go out or socialise with others during the peak of the pandemic, and no access to dine-in pubs or restaurants, we have seen a natural decline in alcohol consumption even as at-home drinking increased.”  So there, you’ve all been good really!

On the sports front the Saudi-led consortium has declined to buy Newcastle from Mike Ashley. Surely, I can’t be the only one who thought of the News of the World’s Fake Sheik during the entire business? Fresh from defeating the West Indies in the test series, England also beat Ireland by 6 wickets in the One Day International. In proper sports news, bike racing has started again, with Remco Evenepoel in the lead at the Vuelta Burgos. The British Grand Prix is this weekend too.

Now we’ll continue our virtual holiday by wine, with this week’s Spaniard now in quarantine we find ourselves alighting in Crete. It is a fabulous place to holiday, with mountains, beaches, ancient ruins, great food and some fabulous wines.

Domaine Lyrarakis Voila Assyrtiko 2019, Crete, Greece – £14.99

Located in the mountainous commune of Alagni, Domaine Lyrarakis stays true to local winemaking traditions.  The domaine focuses on indigenous varieties, taking them from obscurity and driving them in a more modern direction, while still retaining a clear sense of place.  Its style focuses on pure varietal character, precision and supple texture.  The Assyrtiko is an exemplary wine, grown at 580 metres’ altitude in the Voila vineyard.  There is a definite floral character, refreshing minerality and chalky texture to this delicious wine that marries well with all forms of seafood, as you might expect from a producer surrounded by sea!

Enjoy the sunshine!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

I found the dictionary was left open after last week’s email. Someone had clearly been leafing through though, as it was open at Tin Pot Dictator, “An autocratic ruler with little political credibility and delusions of grandeur”, since you ask.

That got us thinking, and chatting in fact, about the parallels between decades in different countries and poor leadership. Before you could say ‘supercalifragilisticexpialidocious’ the army had been called in!  If you’d like to play this game at home, read some news reports of Tiananmen Square from 1989 and compare them to reports from Portland Oregon this week!

In domestic politics we finally had the long delayed report into Russian election meddling. It seems it found no evidence of meddling, mostly because it didn’t look for any. I can’t be the only person who imagined a Police Squad/Naked Gun style script to this? A team of MI5 agents with magnifying glasses walking through several offices staffed with Rosa Klebb look-a-likes and a sign that says “Nothing to see here!” “Здесь нечего смотреть”.

Fed up with Nicola Sturgeon making him look foolish from afar, Boris this week visited Scotland so he could experience it at closer hand. He’s visited Orkney to announce some funding for the islands, but we all know he was really there to stock up on hand dived scallops, Bere Bannocks, and a couple of North Ronaldsay sheep to be delivered to Chequers for the barbecue. Perhaps even a case of each of the local whiskies for the bar at Downing Street.

Whilst he was busy with his shopping, Nicola Sturgeon suggested that the prime minister’s visit to Scotland “highlighted the argument for Scottish independence”. I suspect a chicken crossing the road would have the same significance if you’re in charge of the SNP!

So, normally this time of the year we’d be talking about the big getaway, making jokes about how the best place to photograph Stonehenge is from the traffic jam on the A303. This year we’re not sure, are you all going away? We don’t know whether to have the Southwold shuffle chat, the wrong way up jam and cream tea chat, or a pint at The Ship at Mousehole anecdote?  Perhaps a staycation has us all on the common outside the Hand in Hand playing crab football, or booking a shed at the Pig & Whistle?

Perhaps we’ll have a virtual holiday by wine. This week we’ll start in Provence where the sun shines, the cycling is fabulous and the wine cold and pale pink!

Chateau de l’Aumerade ‘Cuvée Marie Christine’ (£14.99) Cru Classé, Côtes de Provence has been owned by the Fabre family since 1932. Based in Perrefeu-du-Var, they were one of the first estates to bottle their own wine and champion the regions wines. They overhauled the chateau and were awarded the Cru Classé in 1955 and are to this day one of only 18 estates to be able to claim this revered quality status. The wine itself is our bestselling wine most years and is a crisp, dry and elegant blend of Cinsault (35%), Grenache (35%) and Syrah (30%). Very pale in the glass with notes of pink grapefruit and a palate that seems to blend delicate white peach flesh with dried raspberry and a long crisp finish.

So, wherever you’re planning to be for the next few weeks don’t forget to pack a corkscrew and some suntan lotion.

Oh and your swimmers, maybe a sunhat, a mask and perhaps your wellies!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

Another week, filled with its own challenges like many that we have experienced recently.  Events of the week have resulted in dictionary consultations on more than one occasion, just to check that we hadn’t been misled at school.  Some examples are:  

Joined up thinking – thinking about a complicated problem in an intelligent way that includes all the important facts.

To think outside the box – to explore ideas that are creative and unusual and that are not limited or controlled by rules or tradition.

Blue-sky thinking – the activity of trying to find completely new ideas.

Thinking before you speak – an important skill to master for all kinds of situations to improve your relationships with other people and enable you to express yourself in a more effective way and gain trust.

To sing from the same hymn sheet – To have the same understanding of something as someone else; to say the same things about something as other people, especially in public.

Truth – conformity to fact or actuality; a statement proven to be or accepted as true; sincerity; integrity.

Can’t remember what prompted our consultations exactly but I’m sure the names Johnson, Gove and Hancock were nearby – which obviously then led us to look up the meanings of these surnames, since we had the book open. 

Gove apparently relates to one who worked with metals, a smith; or someone who came from Govan, in Lanarkshire; whilst the meaning of Hancock is someone who owns a farm, apparently.

Johnson on the other hand, only has one definition and it would be too vulgar to repeat it here!

But what do we have to worry about – any random unexplained act that Boris gets up to will always get trumped by his pal Donald across the pond.  I imagine you’ve already seen the image but if not you should find the Instagram of the Presidential QVC-like debut, promoting Goya products.  Looking like the least trustworthy 70’s car salesman/newsreader he posed in the Oval Office surrounded by Goya Red Kidney Beans, White Hominy Corn, Goya Adobo All-Purpose Seasoning, Goya Coconut Milk, and Goya Chocolate Wafers.  All this a day after Ivanka posed with Goya beans on twitter – bonkers.

Yes, Donald Trump is still the President of the United States and has Sole Authority and when you’ve got that power you don’t have to explain yourself to anybody…

We are then reminded about how great the internet, the world wide web and social media are in a variety of different headlines:

Russian cyber spies attempting to steal vaccine research from Britain, US and Canada (Sky)

‘Almost certain’ Russians sought to interfere in 2019 UK election – Raab (BBC)

Twitter hack: Bitcoin scam targets Elon Musk, Joe Biden and Barack Obama (The Telegraph)

Blimey, it’s a rollercoaster.

FACEMASKS

I think I have now prevaricated enough and need to return to where we started, with the varied definitions of truth and hymn sheets.  Last Sunday, for one of the first if not the first time, Mr Johnson was seen in shop wearing a facemask.  Quite why England’s second most famous Covid victim (yep, Dominic still tops it here) saw fit to suddenly wear a mask seemed a bit odd to us.  Had he read some new research?  Unlikely, given his reputation for reading.  Had he got the virus again?  Surely not because if so he would have been at home, right.  Had he got a lovebite?  Hard to rule out.  Had enough pressure come to bear that he now had decided the time to wear masks in shops was nigh?  Hmmm….

And by the end of Monday, we knew the answer.  As of next Friday it will be compulsory to wear masks in all shops – however don’t feel like you have to wait until then, we might as well all start getting used to it because it’s going to be months and months before this decision gets reversed and we really don’t want you to stop coming to see us – unless of course you’re a shoplifter!

Otherwise, nothing much else to report – we’re open 4pm-7pm during the week, 2pm – 6pm on Saturday and closed on Sunday.  We are still doing plenty of deliveries so please, if your mask is in the wash and you’re desperate for wine don’t hesitate to get in touch!

And that, my friends, is that.  Another week done, it’s Friday night, fizz night and hopefully we’re all singing from the same hymn sheet!

¡Hasta luego!

Fellow Wine Lovers,

I write to you today from the ‘sunny’ south coast where I am spending a couple of days under the cover of canvas, listening to the gentle pitter patter of drizzle on the flysheet and wondering when is a reasonable time to open a beer.  It’s our annual trip, a chance to catch up with each other after a hectic school year, to see what we’ve all been up to and to spend some proper family time, without TikTok.  Except there has been no dearth of family time over the last few months, I have never been so excruciatingly up-to-date with my teenage children and their idiosyncracies whilst my wife has started cycling into work even though she can more fruitfully work from home, just to get away… 

But we’re out of London and actually, that is the most important thing.  Leaving the environs of SW19 and venturing further than Leatherhead was enough of an adventure; for those of you who are yet to embark on such an odyssey, sadly the M25 is still there.  The middle lane is still the place to travel at 50mph; the inside lane is, I believe, there for purely decorative purposes and doesn’t carry traffic, whilst the outside lane is for nutters who want to travel at 70 and enrage the middle lane tut-tutters.

Anyway we’ve got here, tent up, wood chopped, dog tethered, 2 arguments down and already we’re having fun – is now not a reasonable time to open a beer?

Meanwhile, back in the smoke, it’s been quite a week.  Well actually, not really different from any other of late.  Test cricket came back and with it the rain clouds on day one followed by a total collapse on day two – have we really been missing this?  The Ryder Cup has been postponed and the Epsom Derby managed to sneak under our binoculars last Saturday.  Rosé sales are still buoyant, barbecuing is still a thing and the Volvo is still circling the grid on a regular basis.

And, with much fanfare, pubs opened last weekend, although actually a lot of them didn’t.  Likewise restaurants but not all of them.  We were intrigued to watch our Chancellor dishing out meals at Wagamama’s on Wednesday, without following face mask guidelines – a very Cummingsian/Trumpian approach.  Indeed, none of the staff had any masks on so, certainly not for the first time in recent history, we’re all a bit confused as to what is correct form.

This all followed Rishi’s announcement of more money from his magic money tree.  I can only hope that the nurse who asked Theresa May for a pay-rise 3 years ago and was told there was no such tree has written a letter to Mr Sunak….

The most entertainment has probably come from across the pond as Mr K West reiterates his intention to run for President of the United States.  His party will be called The Birthday Party and he would be running against his pal Donny T but what the hell, why not get yourself on the front page of all the papers once again, tantalise us with the jaw-dropping prospect of a Kardashian FLOTUS, even if it is all just a clever joke

In other, definitely unrelated news, ‘Wash Us in the Blood’, the new single from Kanye was ‘dropped’ last week.

And finally we can all get our nails done and our eyebrows threaded.  And then go to the gym and then for a swim, as long as we don’t do the butterfly, whilst showing off our freshly inked body art.  The latest round of venues allowed to re-open has been announced, and hooray for that, when you read on the other page that Boots and John Lewis are the latest to announce sweeping job cuts.  We find Boot’s a bit of an odd one, being that they were allowed to be open – whilst not functioning at full capacity, agreed – it just goes to show how much of their turnover derives from all those sandwiches and bottles of water they sell.

That’s it from us – the shop is open from 4-7pm today and from 2-5pm tomorrow, to give Wayne enough chance to do all those deliveries you’ll be asking for – sunshine is on its way back and we have plenty of Rosé on board, just so you know!

Surely now it’s a reasonable time to open a beer?

Fellow Wine Lovers,

So there has been quite a lot going on this past week. The British police have hacked into ‘Encrochat’, an encrypted phone network used solely by the criminal fraternity. As a result some £54million, 77 firearms, a couple of tons of drugs, high-end cars and luxury watches have all  been seized as well as more than seven hundred crims nicked. A result for the Police and a bunch of Mr & Mrs Big’s cursing using Huawei for their private network!

China has abandoned any pretence of being an honourable state actor on the International stage, threatening imprisonment for any Hong Kong citizen caught implying less than I’ve just written.  As a direct result, the US has applied sanctions and the UK has honoured plans to allow a citizenship pathway for nearly 2.9 million Hong Kong Citizens.

Whilst we’re busy trashing democracy, it could be mentioned that a poll that allows Putin to stay in power until 2036 “may have been rigged” but we’re not sure anyone would hold the front page for that one.

It looks like we may well be able to go on holiday as the Government looks set to relax travel restrictions to around 90 countries. All I would say is check the regulations for your destination, as many countries have their own separate regulations. You can fly to Australia but there’s no guarantee you’ll get in, and we’re not sure if Hong Kong or Russia are on the list but, as always, you pays your money and makes your choice!

News also reaches us that the FBI has arrested Ghislaine Maxwell in charges relating to Epstein. Despite offering three times Prince Andrew still hasn’t made it to a New York Pizza joint, so we’re certain that the sweat on his brow is from a Click and Collect Romano Diavolo from that lovely place in Woking, and no other reason whatsoever.

On the sport front both Arsenal and West Ham have finally found teams they can beat, West Ham’s was the more surprising. Elsewhere, Wimbledon isn’t happening but on TV last night we witnessed a rather young looking Pete Sampras and we can definitely recommend strawberries lately.

Big news on the music front this week, McFly have just signed their first record deal in ten years.  We were certainly surprised to find it was 7 years ago that ‘Love Is On The Radio’ was released but it wasn’t us that tweeted ‘McFly have just saved 2020’ – we never go in for such hyperbole.  In other music news, The Rolling Stones and Panic! At The Disco have both told Trump to stop using their music at his rallies. A happy 75^th birthday to Debbie Harry, seems a long time since Sunday Girl!

In wine news, fraud is being investigated in both Spain and Italy. In Spain it seems unscrupulous large wineries in Valdepeñas may have been selling millions of litres of wine labelled as higher quality and more aged than it might have been. Whilst in Italy bulk wine has been refilled into original bottles collected from restaurants and then sold in online auctions. The Italian one sounds rather like a film we saw on Netflix! Neither are particularly new frauds but then neither is a pyramid scheme I guess.

According to National Geographic rosé is the thing we should all be drinking and judging by the boxes we’ve been delivering, you lovely lot could have been their case study!

Talking of delivering we still are, so if you’d like us to bring wine to you email us: shop@parkvintners.co.uk and we’ll do the honours. If you prefer to come to the shop we’re open 4-7pm Monday to Friday and 2-5pm on Saturday.

Fellow Wine Lovers,

That’s another week under our belts, time for a glass of wine, need I say more?

Apparently the norm is that yes, I do need to say more before I get to have a drink, so here we go…

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…

Once upon a time, back in the days when Wayne was in 6^th Form, things were different.  One difference was that it was a lot sunnier then, the grass was greener and candle-wicking was a lucrative and sensible career choice.  Another true fact in this delightfully fact-free narration is that every man was allowed to take more than one wife.  One ambitious, middle-aged bachelor showed such ambition by marrying two ladies of differing ages.  The younger wife was eager that her husband appeared as youthful and exuberant as herself whilst the older was more anxious that her husband should show more gravitas and maturity.

So it came to pass that, to achieve their contradictory goals, the young one grabbed every opportunity to pull out her husband’s grey hairs whilst the old one was as industrious in plucking out every black hair she could find.

And the husband, well he just loved all the attention and the head massages – until the fateful morning that he discovered that he had not a hair left on his head!

So, why you might ask, does Aesop get a clumsy Park Vintners makeover today?  Well, the moral of the tale is that no matter how good or innocent your intentions may be, you cannot please all people, all of the time and, in fact, the harder you try the more likely you are to end up pleasing no-one at all.

Which seems to be pretty much where the world is right now.

Street’s like a jungle, so call the police, following the herd, down to Durdle Door

Too much lockdown, not enough lockdown; too close, too far; swimming, gyming, no swimming or gyming; daily update, no daily update; take a flight, never fly again; there are strong arguments for all of these options and, in a world where everybody is now able to criticise everybody else’s choices behind the screens of social media, everyone is right, no matter how unqualified they are to analyse the data.

But the temperature is rising and things are starting to fray around the edges if Brixton and the south coast are anything to go by – the decision to give herd immunity a go has been made unilaterally by the half million people travelling to Bournemouth yesterday – the good news is that we only need 71 more days like this and we could be getting close to the 36 million that would kickstart a vaccine-free immunity.  September 5^th, that’s how long the heatwave will have to last we’re told….

Appetite for Destruction

And here we return to Aesop.  No matter your opinion about the current leadership of the country and their assorted SPAD’s, any announcement made regarding lockdown and its sundry parts was going to upset as many people as it pleased and the bearer of the news was still going to be regarded as a bit of a Bojo.  However, the decision has been made, we will see pubs and restaurants opening; we will see, have perhaps already seen, a reduction in social distance; we can go on holiday in the UK, potentially even fly to Europe too; we can get a haircut too, if we want.  If we want.  No-one is making you go to the pub or sit on the beach in Spain and if you don’t want to then just don’t.  And if you do want to, then do.

Meanwhile, back in the city

I feel we need to change the subject.  As pointed out last week, the return of football hasn’t necessarily scratched that itch, with Liverpool’s tedious trundle to the title confirming that this season will definitely be the one that has an * attached to it.  Golf and Tennis have had their Covid moments and more people have gone on twitter to say ‘I told you so’.  Rebekah Vardy is taking Coleen Rooney to court, which is hilarious on so many levels and would be more funny to more people if they actually knew, or cared, who these ladies are.

And now, over to Worthy Farm

50^th anniversary of Glastonbury this weekend and for those of us who are more used to watching from their Chesterfield than a real field, then this should be a cracker of a weekend.  Hard to suggest where to start, loads on iplayer to watch and plenty of reminiscing to be done, so grab a glass, some falafel and enjoy the spectacle!

That’s it from us really – as mentioned we are still very busy doing deliveries and very happy to continue driving around but should you wish to come and have a browse then we are open from 4pm-7pm Monday to Friday and 2pm-5pm on Saturday.

Can I have my glass of wine now, please?

Fellow Wine Lovers,

What did we learn this week? Well, it seems a number of you have missed us, we opened the door at 4pm on Tuesday and were hard at it all the way to closing at 7pm. Yes, you read that correctly, we have opened the shop again. Rest assured we’ll be continuing with the delivery service but for those of you who prefer to have a chat at our place we’re open Mon-Fri 4-7pm and Saturday 2-5pm. We have sanitiser that we’d like you to use when you arrive and have space for two of you at a time. This will be reviewed in line with Government guidance, or if Marcus Rashford gets involved.

We learnt that our nation’s representations abroad will appear in a very different way in the future, with the announcement that Department for International Development is to be merged with/into the Foreign and Commonwealth Office. I don’t know about you but we find all this back of the fag packet governing slightly alarming.

We’ve learnt that we’re down to Level 3 which will involve a gradual easing of restrictions. We’ll all have to keep washing our hands though, there’s still something unpleasant lurking in the corners. We might be able to go for a swim in the Lido soon, or even get a haircut!

As we bid adieu to Dame Vera Lynn we learned that in 1985 two pounds fifty pence would have bought you entry to a concert at the Crystal Palace Bowl. This anti-heroin concert featured Hawkwind, Lemmy from Motorhead, and Dame Vera Lynn! So many things I feel I missed out on in the 80’s!

We learnt that many, many more companies than we imagined have historical links to slavery even, it would appear, The Guardian, which must be a little uncomfortable for them. Any time traveller will tell you that history cannot be tinkered with, you just need to be sure to learn from it.

On the sport front, our first surprise was learning that Premiership football without crowds is just as dull and boring as its German equivalent proved to be several weeks ago. We followed that up with the shocking discovery that cyclists who plan to race in the Tour de France at the end of August have started ramping up their training. Surely the headline writer didn’t think that they just set the alarm a bit earlier on the first day! We also learnt that if you have some spare cash floating about there are a couple of Formula 1 teams on the market – if you do take the plunge, don’t have Paddy McGuiness as a driver!

So that’s our home-schooling for the week covered, what have you all been up to? Seems Dominic Raab has been misreading Game of Thrones and the Downing Street Jag driver has signed up for some lessons with BSM.

On the wine front, it does appear that rosé season is gaining some steam but we thought we’d mention that the Desjacques Sauvignon Blanc has finally landed, dragging on its coattails a fresh stock of the wonderful Cremant de Loire Rosé.

I think that’s it from us this week, do pop in and see us Mon-Fri 4-7pm and Sat 2-5pm, we will review hours as we move forward.

Prefer us to deliver? As before, send us an email to shop@parkvintners.co.uk with an idea of what you’d like and a budget and we’ll bring a box to your doorstep!