Wine and Wallpaper for the Bank Holiday?

Fellow Wine Lovers,

It’s a Bank Holiday this weekend. We’ve lined up rain, rosé and some fresh fish at the farmers market to cover all basses. Wayne won’t be cycling in Mallorca, Alex won’t be swearing at the WhatsApp he’s just received showing a beachside cold beer with a parked bicycle in the background, and none of us are going to the cinema yet.

A man in Bromley has highlighted just how exciting life in the ‘burbs is by taking six years to park in each and every one of the 211 parking spaces at his local supermarket. We absolutely loved the eccentricity of his project, describing it as like a boring version of Panini sticker books and he even used a spreadsheet to log his spaces, allotting a different colour as each row got filled. The crowning glory for us though, was that his name was Gareth WILD!

In other news, we are beginning to wonder if it’ll be curtains for some of the cabinet and their project to turn Westminster into an enchanted forest full of magic money trees for their chums. It seems the Prime Minister, who once called Nigeria “fantastically corrupt”, has studied rather closely a particular way of governing and its proceeds. But we’re beginning to wonder if that brash foolishness really is just stupidity.

So, imagine for a moment you’re in the PM’s shoes, your hair was cut in a dark room by a barber in a blindfold and you’re wearing Wurzel Gummidge’s emergency suit.

Firstly, why would you try and pin your own leaks on the sleeping ogre who fled Barnard Castle last year? It should come as no surprise that he is rather unhappy with his treatment, might have a paper trail of nefarious goings on and coincidentally is due to testify in front a number of select committees in the near future.  Last year he was telling the truth in the rose garden and we were all terribly nasty to think otherwise. This year, he was lying last year in the rose garden. Which is it?

Next, we’d wonder why would you spend £840 a roll on wallpaper when you have a toddler with crayons?

Then we’d wonder why you’d never watched Judge Judy, Suits or even Judge John Deed, because surely, if you had, you would never have walked straight into that barrister’s trap at Prime Ministers Questions this week.

Most importantly we’d wonder why, as an innocent man, you’re so keen to not answer any questions whatsoever but super enthusiastic to invoke enquiries over which you’ll have the final say on their publication. 

It could be us, of course. Perhaps we’re just difficult curmudgeons who think people should act with a certain amount of probity and maybe you’re right with your assertion that this is all a farrago of nonsense.  But we think we’ll be laughing again when we see #carrieantoinette trending – thanks to whoever came up with that one.

As we mentioned, we’re back up to speed with the rosé but, having looked at the forecast for the weekend, we thought it might be prudent to mention a red wine that might fit the bill too. Alex has been particularly enjoying Domaine Lafond Roc Epine Lirac (£18.99) lately, one of the great undervalued appellations of the Rhône, just across the river to Chateauneuf du Pape. A blend of Grenache (60%) Syrah (30%) & Mourvèdre (10%) with just under a third of the cuvée aged in small french oak barrels it has a lovely dark fruit character, a touch of spice and a great finish.

Wayne has been on a different tack supping from the joys of Spain. Mas Blanche I Jove Sao Abrivat (£17.99) from a fantastic estate in Costers del Segre, inland from Barcelona. The wine is a blend of Tempranillo (40%) , Grenache (35%) and Cabernet Sauvignon (25%) matured in a mixture of French and American oak barrels for around 12 months. The wine is soft with a lovely dark red fruit character and a melange of vanilla, cinnamon and black pepper spice notes before the long balanced finish.

We think both will be handy to have on hand should you be barbecuing or having a roast. The Spaniard particularly, should you be roasting some pork.

If anyone was planning to fund a trip to Mustique we’d happily volunteer as fact finders ahead of any “official” travel.

As usual we shall be CLOSED on BANK HOLIDAY MONDAY.

Chintz!

Wayne & Alex

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