Fellow Wine Lovers,
Right people, we’re back in the real world now, summer’s over as you may have noticed, the schools are finally doing what schools are meant to do and keeping our children out of our wallets and the next stop is Halloween.
Apologies, nothing on earth can be more depressing on your first week back in the chair than thoughts of pumpkins, trick-or-treat and the clocks going back.
And the Newspapers aren’t filled with huge amounts of joy and jollity either ,with the pages filled with stories that have been threatening to become headlines for a long time and now, unfortunately, seem to be here to stay.
However, ours is not to solve crises or discuss political errors, that falls to far greater minds, ours is to keep you distracted over Friday lunchtime and sharpen you up for the weekend. So, to shoulder our responsibility, we have decided to create a shortlist of awards for the last week, plucked from various sources, and in no particular order:
Best Proposed Ruling That Will Never Be Policed
Remember when talking on your mobile phone whilst driving was made illegal – well, that was such a success as we all know, prisons filled overnight, cars were impounded and the very idea of talking on a handheld when behind the wheel became as archaic as smoking on the tube. Now, having taken guidance from heaven knows where, Nottingham council have put a blanket ban on havin’ a gasper during working hours and even when not at work but dressed in council uniform. Who will be the lucky person given the role of enforcing this no smoking policy… mmm, not sure – I suspect this plan to be stubbed out imminently.
Best Beer
Has to be Guinness Zero ABV. Admittedly this is only in Indonesia and has been there for a year apparently, but really, zero alcohol. We drink Guinness because it tastes good as a beverage with alcohol in. Let’s face it, I don’t ever get asked for alcohol-free Whisky because, like the Zero, that would be weird…
Best Climb in Rankings
This has to be a tie between Rory McIlroy and the Welsh football team. Now before Karen, Lee, Roger and Morgs get hot under the collar, I’m not having a dig at the Welsh, that’s not at all what I am meaning. If we take Rory first, he’s now back at world No. 1. Jordan Spieth lost top spot to him this weekend, when he missed the cut. Rory didn’t even raise a club this weekend and yet somehow the person who actually went out and played came of worse than the man who stayed at home and watched Ireland lose to Wales in the rugby (see, I love you really Taff!).
Similarly Wales overtake England in the Fifa world rankings. They’ve had a cracking Euro qualification period and played 7, won 5, drawn 2 which puts them bang on to qualify for next summer. The irony is that England couldn’t have had a better campaign themselves!
Who knew sport could be so complicated?
Best TV Coverage
Has to go to whoever is in charge of the cameramen on La Vuelta a España. Two cyclists taken out by motorbikes filming the race, on 2 separate days, resulting in both riders having to abandon through injury. As if these Grand Tours weren’t hard enough…
Best Letter
From the erstwhile benchmark of bad behaviour, Shane Warne’s open letter to the current enfant terrible of Aussie tennis, Nick Kyrgios, effectively telling him that he needs to earn respect and stop trying everyone’s patience. We won’t go into Shane’s long list of misdemeanours but suffice to say they make a good checklist of things not to do as a professional sportsman (perhaps a letter from David Boon at some point might have kept him on the straight and narrow) but we do think his continued use of ‘u’ in place of ‘you’ in the letter will certainly encourage Nick to take this very, very seriously
Best Laugh, Yesterday
The American news-lady, Harris Faulkner, who is suing Hasbro for making a doll which has the same name as her. Admittedly, they could have used a different name but really, suing for $5 million dollars – apparently she objects to being associated with a toy that presents a choking hazard to children under 3, I kid you not.
What made us laugh though was that she is claiming that the toy bears a strong physical resemblance to her.
It doesn’t.
Not at all, not even if you scrunch up your eyes and turn it sideways. She looks like a glamorous American newsreader and the toy looks like a cheap, yellow plastic toy. Some people really do take themselves a little too seriously…
Best News Regarding Duty And Tax
Apparently all the tax and duty malarkey that we pay on top of our wine actually more than covers the NHS bill. So we can expect far better treatment, big cures for big diseases and larger beds, or a drop in taxes.
No, we don’t see it happening either.
Best News Regarding Health
No proof that wine is bad for you, no proof that it isn’t, we might all just be human, and we’re all going to die anyway, yaaarrgghh…!!!
We read an article that said roughly this earlier in the week but can’t find it now under the pile of bottles. Suffice to say, a new version of the same article will be along in a few weeks’ time – hurrah!
Best Value School Fees
£150 for 6 weeks of Wine School – starts Wednesday 16th September.
Taste 60 wines and, in week 1 get to hear all about Wayne’s holiday, learn lots and lots about them. Sorry, I had to put a sales pitch in somewhere!
Best Wines
Clearly the best wine is the wine in your glass right now, and the wines in our tasting glasses this weekend will be travelling over from South America where, no doubt, it is warmer.
In white we will have the Crios Torrontés 2013, Dominio del Plata, Calchaquies Valley/Altamira, Argentina – £13.49 – Torrontes is Argentina’s speciality grape. Enticing aromas, similar to Viognier, with hints of white pear, white flowers and citrus fruit. On the palate, it has a beautiful structure and acidity along with enticing fruit flavours and plenty of body for a wine that shows such delicate aromas and flavours. Fruity, floral and yet still dry. Asian food with citrus influences, lemon chicken, guacamole, Mexican…
In red we cross the border and have Tabali Reserva Especial Pinot Noir 2013, Limari Valley, Chile £12.99. The Limari Valley is one of Chile’s northernmost regions, and is more coastal than many of the valleys to the south. Cool sea currents just off the coast and morning fog really benefit the Pinot grape, stopping it from becoming overripe and flabby. The wine we have here is a great drop and we reckon its silky red fruits will be a delightful match with everything!
Finally, in yellowy-green, we have Bepi Tosolini’s Limoncello – £21.99 which will give you the opportunity to re-live those snoozy, sun-drenched afternoons on the Costa d’Amalfi…
Best be going now!
That’s it, another lunch over, only a few hours left; it’ll be the weekend before you know it.
Cin-Cin!