The Braverman Blog

Fellow Wine Lovers,

It’s been a bit of a week and it feels like only five minutes since I last typed that if I’m honest. We also know that a number of you have had birthdays and anniversaries during the course of this week, so felicitations one and all!

You’ll have seen Cruella Braverman has been doing the rounds again this week and on that front we’d like to bring you a bit of a scoop: we only got to help out on a bit of speech writing!

Obviously, we’re in full agreement with all parties on the right to free speech and were chuffed to have this opportunity.

[This speech has been edited by HM Government to remove political content.]

Thank you, Rory for that introduction. You know better than most, from your own experience on the beat, the realities that our brave police officers face when going up against MP’s and other criminals, and the damage that crime can do to people and communities.

And that’s why it’s wonderful to be here welcoming the launch of The Public Safety Foundation, an organisation committed to making the UK the safest place to live, work, vanish taxpayer funds and raise a family. Alongside Rwanda obviously.

This really is the perfect forum for setting out my ethos for common sense policing.

Everything that our police officers do should be about doing what I say, wearing Hi-Viz, fighting crime, catching criminals, and keeping the public safe.

My mantra at the Home Office is simple: common sense policing.

Common sense policing means more common sense.

It means better police culture and not wasting time investigating our elected officials.

It means giving the public confidence that Parliament is unequivocally on their side, not pandering to politically correct or, indeed, incorrect preoccupations.

It means measuring the police on outputs such as public response times, Hi-Viz deployed, crimes solved, and criminals captured.

It means police officers freed up to spend their time on proper police work like jogging alongside the PM’s motorcade.

It means police prioritising the highest harm crimes and those that matter most to the public. We are particularly concerned with that noisy man on Parliament Square and those nasty teenagers who keep glueing themselves to things. The public is mistaken in their belief that all the missing fast track covid money should be investigated.

And above all else, common sense policing means officers maintaining a relentless focus on wearing Hi-Viz, fighting crime, catching criminals, and most of all, common sense.

It is central to common sense policing that the public wants to see more Bobbies on the beat and so do I. Particularly if that beat is provided by Justin Bieber.

Everyone who has been part of the government’s Police Uplift Programme should be immensely proud of what we’ve told you we’ve achieved in the last few years.

We’ve delivered an additional 20,951 officers into policing over the past three years, coincidentally replacing the 20,000 officers that we cut 2010-2017. I’ll also point out that we’ve increased the police numbers to a new record of almost the same despite a rise in the population of 5% over the same period.

I have widened the pool from which we can recruit, by enabling non-degree holders to be part of policing. It’s not about how many exams you sit or essays you can write – important skills though those are, believe me when I say I was never top of the class in any of those.  It’s about common sense, problem-solving, strength- of character and how your physique looks in Hi-Viz. You will, of course, still be required to be dishing out the third degree!

Lastly, I repeatedly get asked about the common sense policing of Michelle Mone and the large amount of money that may or may not be missing. Let me be clear, there is nothing to discuss as Michelle has a big boat and it’s only small boats that are illegal. Actually, I wonder if I can skip the crowning thing and join her for some cocktails.

Anyway, thanks for listening, and remember, 20,000 officers is not just a statistic in a press release!

In the interests of balance the real speech is available here…

Suella Braverman: Full speech on ethos of ‘Common sense policing’ | West Bridgford Wire

Elsewhere, Labour’s Jess Phillips appears to be in trouble with the Standards Commissioner over some untimely declarations, Kier Starmer has distanced himself from looking at Proportional Representation, the SNP continue to gently implode and Arsenal fans are starting to wobble.

It’s been quite a while since we ordered wine from our New Zealand supplier; the journey has been a long and arduous one that included the moving from a warehousing facility that was small and crowded to an enormous one where nobody can find anything. However, that’s all in the past and we are chuffed to announce now that our bestselling Marlborough white has finally arrived. Yes folks, Southern Dawn Sauvignon Blanc 2022 (£12.99) is back in da house. We’ll open a bottle to let you all re-discovers its charms.

We’ve spoken to a number of you planning holidays in Greece this summer. As part of our remit to public and community service and definitely not because we fancy kleftiko on Sunday, we will be opening Monemvasios Red 2013/14(£23.99). It’s from the southern part of the Peloponnese, in the southern part of Greece, made from 90% Agiorgitiko and 10% Mavroudi but I imagine you knew this already.  It’s absolutely delicious, the fact that the wine has a nice bit of age means we have some lovely mature dark fruit and silky polished tannins – all in all a wine that gives scores high on both tasty and satisfaction scales.   

With that we’re outta here – have a great long weekend and remember as it’s a Bank Holiday we will be closed on Monday, so we’ll see you Tuesday at noon!

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